Retirement Jokes

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He finally went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.

The elderly gentleman returned to the doctor a month later for a re-check.

The doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.”

To which the gentleman said, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!”

Two older couples were riding in a car. One of the men asked the other, “Been to any good restaurants lately?”

The man said, “I’ll tell you but first, what’s the name of that sweet smelling flower with the thorns that you give on special occasions?”

“You mean a rose,” he replied. The man turned to his wife and said, “Rose, what was the great restaurant we went to the other day?”